I Translate for Dogen (Git Along Little Dogies, Traditional)

"I don't like the way English tastes on my tongue." - Dogen, LA X, Part 2

I got a kick out of Lennon, Dogen's translator, even though Hurley revealed him to be rather unnecessary. Here's a little reflection from Lennon about that, to the tune of the cowboy song Git Along Little Dogies.

I Translate for Dogen

Well, it was a calm afternoon at the Temple
Till Reyes and his band of castaways came.
It seemed their arrival disquieted Dogen.
He told me to order our men to take aim.

Kinda dumb, I know, but I translate for Dogen.
I've been a polyglot since I was young.
Kinda dumb, I know, but I translate for Dogen.
He doesn’t like how English tastes on his tongue.

Reyes was quick and protested to Dogen.
He said a guitar case could prove who he was.
Inside was an ankh, and in that was a name list,
‘Cause Jacob digs distance just like Dogen does.

Kinda dumb, I know, but I translate for Dogen,
Who hates to mingle with regular folk.
Kinda dumb, I know, but I translate for Dogen.
Without him, this Temple would go up in smoke.

Well, I feel a bit silly translating for Dogen;
He’s almost as fluent in English as me.
But I can’t complain; it’s a cushy position,
Superfluous as we both know it to be.

Kinda dumb, I know, but I translate for Dogen.
He leaves his phrase book inside on the shelf.
Kinda dumb, I know, but I translate for Dogen
Until he decides to just speak for himself.

Git Along Little Dogies

Casualties Are Common (Apples and Bananas, Traditional)

On LOST, characters have a nasty habit of dying off - some of them more than once. Here's a little ditty about that to the tune of Raffi's Apples and Bananas.

Casualties Are Common

Alas, on LOST, LOST, LOST, casualties are common.
Alas, on LOST, LOST, LOST, casualties are common.

They got gunned down, down, down, Shannon, Dan and Libby.
They got gunned down, down, down, Shannon, Dan and Libby.

Somebody stabbed, stabbed, stabbed Lennon and Naomi.
Somebody stabbed, stabbed, stabbed Lennon and Naomi.

The Monster smoked, smoked, smoked Seth, Montand and Eko.
The Monster smoked, smoked, smoked Seth, Montand and Eko.

They went ka-boom, boom, boom, Leslie and Ilana.
They went ka-boom, boom, boom, Leslie and Ilana.

Who’s going next, next, next? Candidates, be careful!
Who’s going next, next, next? Candidates, be careful!

Trust (I Will, Paul McCartney)

Here's another LOST parody inspired by What Kate Does. This time, Sayid is the speaker, to the tune of the Beatles' I Will.

Trust

They say I’ve been infected.
Who knows what’s in that pill?
If I take it, it could kill me;
If you want me to, I will.

Although you claim they cured me,
They hardly seem sincere.
But we’ve been in this together
Since the day we landed here.

In this together, so forever,
Jack, you will have my trust.
If you say swallow, I will follow.
I will do what I must.

I don’t care that they fixed me;
It’s you who is my friend.
So just lay it on the line, Jack.
Say this medicine is fine, Jack.
Or advise me to decline the pill, Jack.
Oh, you know I will.
I will.