Farewell to You, My Brother (Farewell to Nova Scotia)

Jack: Desmond, you've done enough. You wanna do something? Go home and be with your wife and son.
Desmond: What about you, Jack?
Jack: I'll see you in another life, brother.
- The End

Farewell to Nova Scotia is one of the most achingly melancholy songs I have ever heard.  It came to mind again after a recent Facebook conversation with my friend Gail, and though I knew the song through the Irish Rovers, when I stumbled upon a live performance by Gordon Lightfoot from 1972, I was utterly mesmerized by the exquisitely elegiac quality of both his voice and face.  It then lodged itself firmly in my brain, and when I'm in filking mode, that means it's about to become my next victim.  I thought this moment was appropriately mournful, with just the right hint of beauty.

Farewell to You, My Brother

You doused the light, and I'm impressed.
You did your job; now it's time to flee.
We're almost at the end of our quest,
So go, and leave the rest to me.

Farewell to you, my brother.  Don't count the cost.
Seek the ones you love across the sea.
I may be far away, but our friendship won't be lost.
I await another meeting in eternity.

Believe me, Desmond, I understand.
You grieve to leave - to let me go.
But life never seems to work out the way we planned,
And it's better to accept what you can't control.

Farewell to you, my brother.  Don't count the cost.
Seek the ones you love across the sea.
I may be far away, but our friendship won't be lost.
I await another meeting in eternity.

A doctor's pledge is to first do no harm.
I won't survive; I have to stay.
So farewell, farewell.  I'll take you by the arm
And then Hurley's gonna raise you to the bright light of day.

Farewell to you, my brother.  Don't count the cost.
Seek the ones you love across the sea.
I may be far away, but our friendship won't be lost.
I await another meeting in eternity.

It took three years, but I passed Jacob's test.
I found my faith, and I am blessed.
When I met you, I'd failed so terribly,
But you helped me 'lift it up,' and now at last, I'm free.

Farewell to you, my brother.  Don't count the cost.
Seek the ones you love across the sea.
I may be far away, but our friendship won't be lost.
I await another meeting in eternity.

Farewell to you, my brother.  Don't count the cost.
Seek the ones you love across the sea.
I may be far away, but our friendship won't be lost.
I await another meeting in eternity.

Farewell to Nova Scotia

MacCutcheon (Dublin O'Shea, Lonnie Donegan / Joe Brown)

"What you're not, is worthy of drinking my whiskey. How could you ever be worthy of my daughter?"
- Widmore, Flashes Before Your Eyes

The scene in Flashes Before Your Eyes in which Charles Widmore so thoroughly disses Desmond with some help from a 60-year-old bottle of scotch remains one of the most iconic in the series.  I'm still not entirely sure if Charles was as oblivious to Desmond's previous existence as he seemed in that scene, but here I'm going to assume that he was. Here's Charles to the tune of the Irish Rovers' Dublin O'Shea.

MacCutcheon

“Here’s a little drink, boy.  MacCutcheon’s the best.
Although you’re my guest, I have deemed you unworthy,
And if you’re too base for the scotch on my chest,
Then how could I hand you my daughter, you fool?”

He came to my office to look for a job,
But he seemed like a slob, just a slouch and a roustabout.
Still, I was willing to toss him a bob.
Then Desmond asked for my daughter.

“Here’s a little drink, boy.  MacCutcheon’s the best.
Although you’re my guest, I have deemed you unworthy,
And if you’re too base for the scotch on my chest,
Then how could I hand you my daughter, you fool?”

I spoke of a hero, the Navy man Mac,
And mentioned the plaques earned by Admiral Anderson.
Maybe I could’ve cut the poor lad some slack,
But he’d landed himself in hot water.

“Here’s a little drink, boy.  MacCutcheon’s the best.
Although you’re my guest, I have deemed you unworthy,
And if you’re too base for the scotch on my chest,
Then how could I hand you my daughter, you fool?”

He left in a flurry, full of anguish and shame,
And I hoped that his name wouldn’t come back to haunt me.
But Desmond, determined to earn my acclaim,
Turned himself to a consummate sailor.

“Here’s a little drink, boy.  MacCutcheon’s the best.
Although you’re my guest, I have deemed you unworthy,
And if you’re too base for the scotch on my chest,
Then how could I hand you my daughter, you fool?”

He got to the Island I lost long ago,
And he made the hatch blow with the turn of his key.
Then he married Penelope.  Galling, I know,
But I’ll no longer call him a failure.

“Here’s a little drink, boy.  MacCutcheon’s the best.
Although you’re my guest, I have deemed you unworthy,
And if you’re too base for the scotch on my chest,
Then how could I hand you my daughter, you fool?”

Dublin O'Shea

You're a Creep (She'd Rather Be With Me, Garry Bonner / Alan Gordon)

"Well, I noticed you've been parked here a while watching the kids, and well, it is a school. Do you have a child who goes here?"
- Ben, Everybody Loves Hugo

Ben can be pretty creepy, but as Dr. Linus, he's more concerned about thwarting creeps. Here's Ben on pervert patrol in Everybody Loves Hugo, to the tune of the Turtles' She'd Rather Be With Me.

You’re a Creep

Some nights, I have dreadful dreams,
And they frighten me away from sleep.
Well, my nightmares are true, it seems,
‘Cause it looks to me like you’re a creep.

You’re a guy with his eye upon my teens,
And I've guessed just what that means.
I detest such sordid scenes.

Sometimes I get out of school,
And I see a stranger in a car,
And this time, since I’m not a fool,
I suspect that you’re a bit bizarre.

You’re a guy with his eye upon my teens,
And I've guessed just what that means.
I detest such sordid scenes.

Even if I’ve got it wrong,
Move along. Just move along.
Even if I’ve got it wrong,
Move along. Just move along.

Some nights, I have dreadful dreams,
And they frighten me away from sleep.
Well, my nightmares are true, it seems,
‘Cause it looks to me like you’re a,
Pretty sure that you’re a,
It looks to me like you’re a creep.
Don’t think I’m wrong. Move along.
It looks to me like you’re a creep.
Don’t think I’m wrong. Move along.
It looks to me like you’re a creep.

(fadeout)

She'd Rather Be With Me

Lightning Was Striking Your Tent (Lightnin' Strikes, Lou Christie / Twyla Herbert)

"Look, maybe you should move down the beach, just for tonight. That way I can fix it - make some improvements."
- Desmond, Every Man For Himself


In season three, Charlie practically had to drag a confession out of Desmond regarding his strange activities. Here, to the tune of Lou Christie's Lightnin' Strikes, I imagine Desmond trying to tip off a rather unreceptive Charlie a bit earlier as Smokey tosses out taunts in the distance.

Lightning Was Striking Your Tent

Desmond: Listen to me, Charlie. Accept it if you can.
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: I’ve got bad news. I hope you take it like a man.
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: Listen to me, Charlie. Don’t let it get you down.
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: You should be all right just as long as I’m around.

Destiny wants you dead, so you must heed my warnings, friend.
It’s time you knew what these strange signs portend.

You'll learn a lot from this burly Scot.
(Charlie: What?)
Desmond: What I saw
(Charlie: What?)
Desmond: Ought to drop your jaw.
Lightning was striking your tent!
Lightning was striking your tent!

I don’t understand this any more than you.
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: Believing in flashes is peculiar and new.
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: I’d advise you paying close attention to me.
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: I’ll do the seeing, Charlie. What’ll it be?

You might think I’m odd. I don’t care. Brother, move your hut
Or bad things will come, and I’ve already told you what.

Soon the weather will get rough. This is not a bluff.
(Charlie: What?)
Desmond: What I saw
(Charlie: What?)
Desmond: Ought to drop your jaw.
Lightning was striking your tent!
Lightning was striking down your tent,
Which I’m meant to prevent like a gent!
(Smokey: Charlie, you’re doomed.
Charlie, you’re doomed.
Charlie, you’re doomed.)
Desmond: Lightning was striking your tent!
Lightning was striking your tent!

I feel awkward now, you know,
Talking crazy and playing God.
Please don’t make me go
Turn a club to a lightning rod.

If you’re not fond of pain and you value your brain,
(Charlie: What?)
Desmond: What I saw
(Charlie: What?)
Desmond: Ought to drop your jaw.

Lightning was striking your tent!
Yeah, lightning was striking down your tent,
Which I’m meant to prevent like a gent!
Charlie, lightning was striking your tent,
Which I’m meant to prevent like a gent!

Should I Save His Life Again? (Early Morning Rain, Gordon Lightfoot)

"I keep saving your life, and what good has it done? It's just gonna keep happening again and again, maybe that's the point, eh? Maybe it's a test."
 - Desmond, Catch-22

I think one reason the scene between Sayid and Desmond in The Last Recruit was so powerful was that Desmond had been similarly tempted to sacrifice Charlie for the sake of a reunion with Penny. Here I imagine Desmond's own crisis of conscience to the tune of Peter Paul and Mary's Early Morning Rain.

Should I Save His Life Again?

Should I save his life again when it’s time for him to die?
If the arrow finds his throat, can I look him in the eye?
For the sake of true love, must I sacrifice my friend
And be saddled with a guilt he can’t comprehend?

Brother Campbell told the tale of Abraham giving up his son.
If I let his death unfold, who will laud what I have done?
If it’s some great cosmic test, then will God reward my zeal,
Or will I be condemned for a dirty devil’s deal?

What is right and what is wrong? (What is right and what is wrong?)
Is there any way to know? (Is there any way to know?)
Do I interfere with fate or do I let Charlie go?
If I had him make the call, would he choose suicide?
If I knew the choice was his, would my own remorse subside?

With the moment drawing near, still the cryptic questions taunt.
Is it selfish to proceed? Is this what my love would want?
If I step aside, then I’ll be sure to find Pen,
But my conscience won’t comply, so I’ll save his life again.
No, my conscience won’t comply, so I’ll save his life again.

What Will You Tell Her? (This Night, Billy Joel / Ludwig Van Beethoven)

"This woman - when she asks you what you did to be with her again... what will you tell her?" - Desmond, The Last Recruit

Probably my favorite single scene in The Last Recruit is the encounter between Sayid and Desmond at the well. Like everyone else I've consulted, I'm convinced that Sayid let Desmond live. They were friends, after all, and Desmond can be pretty persuasive... Here's Desmond in that scene to the tune of Billy Joel's This Night.

What Will You Tell Her?

Brother, I think
You ought to give me a reason
If you intend on
Shooting me in cold blood.
I was your friend,
And so this murder is treason.
Will you stand by as I die
Like a dog in the mud?

Brother, if love
Is your professed motivation,
If you believe
He can restore the one you lost,
You’re a naive
Victim of manipulation.
Will you obey? First I pray
You’ll consider the cost.

Should she return,
And should she want to learn
What you did to be with her again,
Sayid, what will you tell her?

Under your gaze,
Penny and I reunited.
You saved my mind;
Now let me help preserve your soul.
Brother, you’re blind -
Or you are sadly short-sighted.
Where will you run after gunning me
Down in this hole?

What will you say
To get relief from your conscience?
Will you confess,
Hoping that she will understand?
Will you address
This risen woman with nonsense,
Knowing you’d chill her by killing
An innocent man?

Should she return,
And should she want to learn
What you did to be with her again,
Sayid, what will you tell her?

Should she return,
And should she want to learn
What you did just to be with her again,
Sayid, what will you tell her?

Sayid... Oh...
If you do this to be with her again,
Sayid, what will you tell her?

This Night

She Was There (I'll Be There, Berry Gordy / Bob West / Hal Davis / Willie Hutch)

"I'm talking about spectacular, consciousness-altering love. Do you know what that looks like?" - Charlie, Happily Ever After

I've always loved the Jackson 5's I'll Be There; it wasn't until now that I realized just how much stuff was going on in the background vocally. It's a much more involved song than it initially seems. Anyway, I had to turn it into a vehicle for Charlie explaining to Desmond his experience of "what love looks like" in Happily Ever After, with Desmond chiming in now and then, along with visions of Claire and Penny.

She Was There

Charlie: Have you been in love before?
I was standing at death‘s door.
Then in my head, she was there.
(Claire: I was there.)
Charlie: As I slipped into abyss,
She appeared, and all was bliss.
Just for a moment, she was there.
(Claire: I was there.)

Charlie: I tell you,
She was there, and she was real. (Claire: I was there)
Charlie: What a rapturous blonde beauty! (Claire: With)
Charlie: And I swear that she knew me. (Claire: You.)
Charlie: She was there, but to my dismay, (Claire: I was there)
Charlie: I was revived, and she dimmed away. (Claire: With you.)
(Claire: Dimmed away, dimmed away, dimmed away...)
Desmond: That’s not true. That’s not true.

Charlie: Mr. Hume, contain your mocking laughter,
For I have seen such a sweet hereafter.
I’ll make you believe me. She was there.
(Claire: I was there.)
Charlie: She was there to enfold me.
(Claire: Yes, Charlie...)
Charlie: Never knew how that felt. No one told me.
Just for a moment, she was there.
(Claire: I was there.)

Charlie: I tell you,
She was there, and she was real. (Claire: I was there)
Charlie: What a rapturous blonde beauty! (Claire: With)
Charlie: And I swear that she knew me. (Claire: You.)
Charlie: She was there, but to my dismay, (Claire: I was there)
Charlie: I was revived, and she dimmed away. (Claire: With you.)
Desmond: No, that’s not true. That’s not true.
(Claire: Dimmed away, dimmed away, dimmed away...)

Charlie: I’m only mentioning this to you
In hopes your consciousness changes too.
You’ll find a purpose. She’ll be there.
(Penny: I’ll be there.)

Charlie: Then you’ll know what love looks like.
She’ll be there. She’ll be there.
Just for a moment,
(Penny: I’ll be there.)
Charlie: She’ll be there.

Desmond: Well, that’s poetry right there, brother!

Charlie: Yes, she’ll be there. She’ll be there.
I’ll make you believe me.
(Penny: I’ll be there.)
Charlie: She’ll be there.
Then you’ll know what love looks like.
(Penny: Desmond, I’m waiting for you.) Charlie: She’ll be there.
(Penny: Desmond, I’m waiting for you.) Charlie: She’ll be there.
Just for a moment,
(Penny: I’ll be there.)
Charlie: She’ll be there.
Yes, Mr. Hume!
(Penny: Desmond, I’m waiting for you.) Charlie: She’ll be there.
(Penny: Desmond, I’m waiting for you.) Charlie: She’ll be there...

(fadeout)

A New Color (True Colors, Tom Kelly / Billy Steinberg)

As any faithful fan of the original Star Trek series knows, unless you're Scotty or Uhura, you don't really want to be wearing a red shirt if you're serving on the U. S. S. Enterprise. The tradition of killing off redshirts has persisted throughout many subsequent science fiction series, and LOST is no exception. Usually, these minor characters don't literally wear such identifying garb. But because of the association, whenever someone does wear red, it makes people nervous. It hasn't escaped fans' attention that both Hurley and Desmond are in red shirts this season. They're much too integral to the show to actually be "redshirts". But could their fashion choices be a warning of dreadful things to come? Here's some rumination from the fan perspective to the tune of Cyndi Lauper's True Colors.

A New Color

Huggable Hurley, voice of the viewer,
It’s too early to see you get skewered.
You’re a man of the people, picked to be a Candidate.
You deserve to avoid a lowly redshirt’s fate.

So you need a new color. Change your shirt.
You need a new color before it can hurt you.
‘Cause when you wear red, the reaper’s near.
A new color, new color will calm us down.
We’re freaked out here.

You’re on this Island. Desmond, you’re rattled
That you’re back again though you’ve bravely battled.
To keep from going crazy, keep your Constant inside your soul.
Watch out for John and don’t get tossed in a hole.

And you need a new color. Change your shirt.
You need a new color before it can hurt you.
‘Cause when you wear red, the reaper’s near.
A new color, a new color will calm us down.
We’re freaked out here.

Why was Widmore bent on bringing you back?
To keep from going crazy, keep Penny inside your soul.
Watch out for John and don’t get tossed in a hole.

And you need a new color. Change your shirt.
You need a new color before it can hurt you.
‘Cause when you wear red, the reaper’s near.
A new color, new color, new color will calm us down.
You need a new color before it can hurt you.
‘Cause when you wear red, the reaper’s near.
A new color, new color will calm us down.
We’re freaked out here.

I'll Win This Race (Come Sail Away, Dennis DeYoung)

"Then I thank you, Elizabeth. And I shall win this race for love."
- Desmond, Live Together, Die Alone

I've always found the Styx song Come Sail Away a little freaky, but it's also enjoyably epic, especially since it calls to mind one of my favorite moments from Freaks and Geeks, Judd Apatow's most excellent and all too short-lived high school dramedy. Couldn't resist associating it with LOST too, as an illustration of the scene in the season two finale in which Libby offers Desmond her boat.

I’ll Win This Race

Desmond: I’m sailing a race
Sponsored by the man who belittled me.
He said I’d never be
Worthy of his daughter Penelope.
But there’s a wee problem.
I have no boat.
I’m broke, so my chances
Would seem remote,
But for my
Honor, I’ll try...
Is something wrong?

Libby: I have what you seek.
It used to be my husband’s, but he grew weak.
Poor David. He died.
He never got to sail on a Grecian tide.
Since we cannot be together,
It’s a burden now.
He’d want you to keep it,
And you have my vow:
In your care
Clearly is where
My boat belongs.

Desmond: You tell me I should take it.
I don’t know what to say,
But I’ll accept it as a sign
That love will find a way.

And so I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love, lass.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love. Watch me!
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.

Elizabeth, you’ve touched me.
Tell you what I’ll do.
I’ll win this race for Penny,
For David and for you.

Yes, I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love, lass.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.
I’ll win this race, I’ll win this race,
I’ll win this race for love.

(fadeout)

Getting Harder (Getting Better, John Lennon / Paul McCartney)

"Desmond. I know... it's getting harder."- George, The Constant

The Constant, one of my favorite episodes of LOST, focuses on Desmond's experience of being unanchored in time, but George Minkowski, the communications officer on the freighter, is going through the same thing as Desmond and is thus able to empathize and give him an idea of what to expect. Here, to the tune of the Beatles' Getting Better, George and Desmond compare notes.

Getting Harder

George: It’s getting harder all the time.

No fun on a ship when it’s moored.
(Desmond: Hey, what happened, mate?)
George: Easy for us to get bored.
(Desmond: So what happened, mate?)
George: My buddy and me set out to sea,
Thought it was time we explored.

Hey, Desmond, I know. It’s getting harder,
(Desmond: Harder)
George: A little harder all the time.
(Desmond: When will I jump next?)
George: Hey, Desmond, I know. It’s getting harder.
(Desmond: Harder)
George: It’s getting hard not to lose your mind.

My friend had a panic attack,
So we turned around and came back.
Went out of his head, then Brandon was dead,
And now I’m the one out of whack.

Hey, Desmond, I know. It’s getting harder,
(Desmond: Harder)
George: A little harder all the time.
(Desmond: When will I jump next?)
George: Hey, Desmond, I know. It’s getting harder.
(Desmond: Harder)
George: It’s getting hard not to lose your mind.
Getting so much harder all the time!

George: It’s getting harder all the time.
Desmond: Harder, harder, harder.
George: It’s getting harder all the time.
Desmond: Harder, harder, harder.

George: One minute I’m strapped to a table.
Then I’m on a Ferris wheel, feeling as free as a bird.
This is bizarre, but I’ve made it so far.
Can you get it to stop? Say the word.

Yes, I know it’s getting harder.
(Desmond: Harder)
George: A little harder all the time.
(Desmond: When will I jump next?)
George: Desmond, I know it’s getting harder.
(Desmond: Harder)
George: It’s getting hard not to lose your mind.
Getting so much harder all the time.

It’s getting harder all the time.
Desmond: Harder, harder, harder.
George: It’s getting harder all the time.
Desmond: Harder, harder, harder.
George: Getting so much harder all the time.

You Need Love (Give Me Love, George Harrison)

"I feel sorry for you, mate. You think you're happy. You think you've got it all - this, your life. But, you don't."
- Charlie, Happily Ever After

In Happily Ever After, Sideways Charlie advises Desmond that his life is meaningless without "spectacular, consciousness-altering love". Here he imparts his wisdom to the tune of George Harrison's Give Me Love.

You Need Love

You need love.
You need love,
Not a one-night stand.
You may think
That the world
Is at your command,
But I know
And I’ll show you
Just where you’re wrong.
Thanks to me,
You will see
Where we both belong.

Mr. Hume…

You’ll forget about cash
The moment this car crashes.
Won’t you heed your flashes?

You need love.
You need love,
Not a one-night stand.
You may think
That the world
Is at your command,
But I know
And I’ll show you
Just where you’re wrong.
Thanks to me,
You will see
Where we both belong.

Mr. Hume…
Won’t you heed your flashes?

You need love.
You need love,
Not a one-night stand.
You may think
That the world
Is at your command,
But I know
And I’ll show you
Just where you’re wrong.
Thanks to me,
You will see
Where we both belong.

You need love.
You need love,
Not a one-night stand.
You may think
That the world
Is at, is at your command,
But I know
And I will show
Just where you’ve gone wrong.
Thanks to me,
You will see where
We both belong.

Widmore's Whiskey (Nancy Whiskey, Traditional)

Desmond: What kind of whiskey is that?
Charlie: It's, uh - it just says MacCutcheon.
Desmond: Alright then, let's have it!
- Flashes Before Your Eyes

In Flashes Before Your Eyes, Desmond wants to lay off the booze, but he'll make an exception for MacCutcheon whiskey. Here's a reflection by him to the tune of the Irish Rovers' Nancy Whiskey.

Widmore’s Whiskey

Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.

I was a sailor, a restless sailor.
I was a soldier, a silent monk…
Even tried to be a doctor.
I always wound up a raving drunk.

Is that whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey?
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.

In an ancient monastery,
Hiding from my intended wife,
I imbibed the wine we bottled,
So I got sacked from monastic life.

Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.

As I was leaving, I met a woman.
Before that woman, I had no base.
She became my guiding vision.
Penny Widmore, my saving grace.

Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.

I went in to see her father,
A man of aristocracy.
He poured a bit of his prized MacCutcheon
Just to say it was too good for me.

Is that whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey?
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.

I was a sailor, a restless sailor.
I drank so much that I thought I would drown.
I’m going sober, clean and sober,
But that’s MacCutcheon, so pass it down.

Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.
Whiskey, whiskey, Widmore’s whiskey.
Whiskey, whiskey, pass it down.

Nancy Whiskey

Penny Milton (Pretty Woman, Roy Orbison)

Desmond: I don't know...I don't know what I felt.
Daniel: Yes, you do. You felt love.
Desmond: That's impossible, because I don’t know anything about this woman, I don't know...I don't know where she is. I don't even know if she exists. She's...she's an idea.
- Happily Ever After

Desmond and Penny are fated to find each other, but there always seem to be complications. Here, Sideways Desmond battles Eloise before getting some help from Daniel about Penny's whereabouts, to the tune of Roy Orbison's Pretty Woman.

Penny Milton

Desmond: Penny Milton. That’s the name they said.
Penny Milton. But is it in my head?
Penny Milton.
I have to struggle to understand
The words I saw on Charlie’s hand.
Penny...

Penny Milton. Could it really be?
Penny Milton. Is she the one for me?
Penny Milton.
I need some answers, Eloise.
Let me see that guest list, please.
Now!

Eloise: Penny Milton? Just forget.
Desmond, you’re not ready yet.
Your arrival is a threat to me.

Desmond: Penny Milton. So surreal,
And I can’t conceal my zeal.
Penny Milton, now revealed to me.
But this Penny, does she exist?
Would it be crazy if I persist?

Penny Milton. I’m losing steam.
Penny Milton. Is she a dream?
Penny Milton. I know what I feel. It’s real.
But am I chasing a mere ideal?

Daniel: Now there’s no reason for such gloom.
She’s my half-sister, Mr. Hume.
Take it from me.
I can tell you where she’ll be.
Yes, I know just where she’ll be.
You’ll find Penny Milton.

Tell Desmond I'm Sorry (She Loves You, Paul McCartney / John Lennon)

"I need to ask a favor of you, Sun. If you can ever get off this Island, find Desmond Hume for me. Tell him I said I was sorry."
- Ben, Dead Is Dead

Ben's done quite a bit of apologizing in the past couple of seasons. Here's a rehash of his apology to Desmond via Sun, with an apology to Sun herself thrown in for good measure, to the tune of the Beatles' She Loves You.

Tell Desmond I’m Sorry

Tell Desmond I’m sorry.
Tell Desmond I’m sorry.
Tell Desmond that I was wrong.

Before I face this doom,
There is something I must say:
If you see Desmond Hume
When you get back to L. A.,

Tell him I’m sorry.
He will know the reason why.
Yes, I’m sorry, and for once, that’s not a lie.

I earned his enmity
By giving in to hate.
I almost didn’t see
The truth until too late.

Tell him I’m sorry.
He will know the reason why.
Yes, I’m sorry, and for once, that’s not a lie. No!

Tell Desmond I’m sorry.
Tell Desmond I’m sorry.
Please believe me, Sun, for once it’s not a lie.

Well, you detest me too,
And I am not surprised.
With what I’ve put you through,
I ought to be despised.

So, Sun, I’m sorry,
And you know the reason why.
I’m sorry, and for once that’s not a lie. No!

Tell Desmond I’m sorry.
Tell Desmond I’m sorry.
Please believe me, Sun, for once it’s not a lie.
Please believe me, Sun, for once it’s not a lie.
Please believe me, Sun, for once it’s not a lie.
I’m sorry, and I was wrong.

See You in Another Life (Shanghai Breezes, John Denver)

"See you in another life, yeah?"
- Desmond, Orientation

By the end of the season two finale, disoriented Scotsman Desmond had become one of my favorite characters on LOST. In the beginning of the season, he seemed totally unhinged in Island times but sage and serene in Jack's flashback. When I first saw him taking five with Jack in those bleachers, I had no idea how important and beloved he would become. Here's a reflection by Desmond just before his first departure from the Island, with just a hint of season six thrown in, to the tune of John Denver's Shanghai Breezes.

See You In Another Life

Promise me that if, by some strange miracle,
The computer starts to work again,
You’ll cast away your pride. Oh, Jack, don’t be a fool.
Don’t wait; it will be too late then.
You want to see what happens when the clock runs out?
I hope by then I’m far away.
First, a little something to reduce your doubt:
We were running buddies in L. A.

I remember you now from Los Angeles, mate,
About to take the surgeon’s knife.
My meeting you here feels a whole lot like fate,
So I’ll see you in another life.

Learn the numbers. They start with a four and an eight.
There’s fifteen and then sixteen, too.
And these numbers, the ones I so thoroughly hate,
End twenty-three, forty-two.
I’m sorry that the woman who I helped you save
Is not wed to you anymore.
Brother, let it go. The consequences will be grave
If you don’t perform this little chore.

I remember you now from Los Angeles, mate,
About to take the surgeon’s knife.
And my meeting you here feels a whole lot like fate,
So I’ll see you in another life.

In another life, I’ll see you,
No doubt in my mind.
In another life, I’m key to
Unearthing what you yearn to find.

I remember you now from Los Angeles, mate,
About to take the surgeon’s knife.
And my meeting you here feels a whole lot like fate,
So I’ll see you in another life.

I remember you now from Los Angeles, mate,
About to take the surgeon’s knife.
And my meeting you here feels a whole lot like fate,
So I’ll see you in another life.
Yes, I will see you in another life.

Shangai Breezes

The Hidden Hatch (The Rattlin' Bog, Traditional)

One of the most intriguing mysteries LOST handed us was the question of what was in the hatch that John and Boone found hidden in the jungle. In season two, we got our answer. I imagine this song, to the tune of the Irish Rovers' version of The Rattlin' Bog, as a dialogue between the viewers and head writers Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse, and I like how the structure of the song drops one piece of the puzzle at a time, just like the show. I also like how, at least as I see it, at the heart of the hatch is Love, especially if we can see the hatch as a metaphor for the show.

The Hidden Hatch

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: Well, in that hatch,
There is a hall, a long hall, a spooky hall.
Hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: And down the hall,
There is a room, a large room, a gloomy room.
Room down the hall
And the hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: And in that room,
There is a Scot, a crazed Scot, a lonely Scot.
Scot in the room
And the room down the hall
And the hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: And by that Scot,
There is some booze, some strong booze, some bottled booze.
Booze by the Scot
And the Scot in the room
And the room down the hall
And the hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: And by the booze,
There is a book, an old book, a Dickens book.
Book by the booze
And the booze by the Scot
And the Scot in the room
And the room down the hall
And the hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: And in that book,
There is a note, a short note, a secret note.
Note in the book
And the book by the booze
And the booze by the Scot
And the Scot in the room
And the room down the hall
And the hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: And in that note
Are words of love, of true love, of constant love.
Love in the note
And the note in the book
And the book by the booze
And the booze by the Scot
And the Scot in the room
And the room down the hall
And the hall in the hatch
And the hatch out in the jungle-o.

Viewers: What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?
What’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o?

Darlton: That’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o.
That’s in the hidden hatch,
The hatch out in the jungle-o!

Brother Desmond (Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da, Paul McCartney)

Since I snatched Penny up from the Beatles' catalog, I figured Desmond deserved the same treatment. Here's a LOST ditty to the tune of Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da, mostly inspired by the episode Catch-22.

Brother Desmond

Desmond, you're a coward and you just can't face
Marriage to your Scottish sweetheart Ruth.
Fear and not devotion brought you to this place.
It's time that you let Brother Campbell know the truth.

You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.
You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.

Desmond, you will have to make a sacrifice
In your quest to prove you're not too scared.
You won't find the years of isolation nice,
But with this month of silence, now you're more prepared.

You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.
You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.

In a decade or so, you will make a dashing groom.
You will cheekily smile as the priest declares you
Desmond and Penny Hume.

Happ'ly ever after won't come easy, Des.
Though you'll sometimes wish your life would end,
Put your trust in Penny when she plainly says
She loves you in her note in Our Mutual Friend.

You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.
You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.

In a decade or so, you will make a dashing groom.
You will cheekily smile as the priest declares you
Desmond and Penny Hume.

Happ'ly ever after won't come easy, Des.
Many troubles wait around the bend.
Someday, though, she'll help you banish emptiness,
And you will sail away on Our Mutual Friend.

You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.
You're a drunk, not a monk, Brother Desmond!
God has other plans for you.

What are you running to?
Get ready to find out.

Dan In My Dream (Dance Little Jean, Jimmy Ibbotson)

There's been entirely too little Desmond in season five of LOST. I'm hoping the next episode rectifies that a bit. In the meantime, here's a little something, to the tune of Nitty Gritty Dirt Band's Dance Little Jean, reflecting on his appearance earlier in the season.

Dan in My Dream

I joined a boat race for my honor,
And I never thought that I would be marooned,
But then a storm sidetracked me,
And Kelvin kept me helplessly entombed.
So I was praying for some answers,
And I swore that if I ever could depart,
I would never think again about the Island
That I loathed with all my heart.

Then my depression turned to panic.
I heard somebody pounding on my door.
When I cocked my gun and greeted him,
It seemed to me that I'd seen him before.
But as he rushed to spill his secrets, Pen,
I couldn't comprehend what he could mean.
Then he told me that I had to meet
His mother, and I woke from the dream.

Well, it was Dan in my dream, but I don't know how.
What made me forget that moment until now?
Dan in my dream, a strange memory.
Oh, why can't that blasted Island just be done with me?

I don't want to go to Oxford.
We've been careful to avoid your father's net.
What if listening to Dan leads us right to him
And amplifies his threat?
But I owe my life to Faraday,
So even though this may be a mistake,
I will do just what he said to
For faith and fate and friends I can't forsake.

Yeah, I saw Dan in my dream, but I don't know how.
What made me forget that moment until now?
Dan in my dream, a strange memory.
Oh, why can't that blasted Island just be done with me?
Tell me, why can't that blasted Island just be done with me?

Dance Little Jean

The Thinker (The Tinker, John Reynolds)

I've really missed Daniel, my favorite season-four addition to the cast, in these last few episodes of LOST, so I'm very much looking forward to the next episode, in which he seems likely to play a central role. He's a reflection by him, addressing a just-departed Desmond, to the tune of the Irish Rovers' The Tinker, inspired by the episode The Constant.

The Thinker

'Tis a thinker I am, a pondering man
Accustomed to sounding bizarre,
Always dodging defeat while the Oxford elite
Sit and sully my name in the bar.

Though I shrug off the sneers I've received from my peers
When they should have been doling out praise,
I am stung by each slight, so I keep out of sight,
Seeking proof in a rat and a maze.

So thank you for showing that I'm not a liar,
That my theories are really true,
That I've not been misled by these thoughts in my head.
For your validation, thank you.

Though I'm hardly insane, I'll admit that the brain
Underneath all my scraggly hair
Has been jolted and jarred and repeatedly scarred
By the tests that I run in my lair.

So thank you for showing that I'm not a liar,
That my theories are really true,
That I've not been misled by these thoughts in my head.
For your validation, thank you.

You restored my resolve when you entered my life,
Bringing meaning to all that I've done.
Though you're already leaving, our fates are entwined,
And our kinship has only begun.

When you're settled in time, leave some room in your mind
To remember our meeting here, please.
I intend to depend on your being my friend
If I end up like Eloise.

So thank you for showing that I'm not a liar,
That my theories are really true,
That I've not been misled by these thoughts in my head.
For your validation, thank you.

So thank you for showing that I'm not a liar,
That my theories are really true,
That I've not been misled by these thoughts in my head.
For your validation, thank you.

The Tinker

Penny Girl (Danny Boy, Traditional)

The writers' strike put a bit of a damper on the fourth season of LOST, mainly in terms of developing the quartet of new characters who came from the freighter. Nonetheless, this season has had some of the most beautiful moments of the series thus far, and perhaps my favorite of them all is the life-saving phone call that occurs at the end of The Constant, a brilliant episode from start to finish. Here's my meager attempt to capture some of its glory. I think of it sort of as Desmond practicing what he's going to say to Penny when he tracks her down in 1996, to the tune of Danny Boy.

Penny Girl

Oh Penny girl, my mind, my mind is flailing.
Again, again I'm tumbling with the tide.
Adrift, alone and starless, I am sailing.
It's you, it's you can heal this great divide.

So bring me back. Pen, sing me to my senses.
With you my anchor, I will not let go,
And I'll atone for all my past offenses.
Oh Penny girl, oh Penny girl, I love you so.

Eight years from now, you'll hear the fateful chiming -
If you have faith. Oh, Penny, please believe!
And when you answer, I will praise the timing,
The perfect present on that Christmas Eve.

Then, through my tears, I'll cast away my sorrow.
Though it may seem that I am lost at sea,
You'll have my pledge to meet you in tomorrow,
My life preserved, Pen, by your constant love for me.