Joanna (Rosanna, David Paich)

"You think you're all noble and heroic for coming after me? I was fine! You're not the only one who knows what to do around here, you know that? I run a business! Who appointed you our savior, huh?"
- Boone, White Rabbit

We never got to know Joanna, the castaway who drowned less than a week after the crash of Flight 815, and neither did much of anybody else. Here Jack runs the gamut of emotions before ultimately using her tragic death as an impetus for a more united camp, to the tune of Toto's Rosanna.

Joanna

Boone: Think you’re noble, Jack?  Well, I didn’t need a savior, and someone died.
Joanna, Joanna.
She only drowned ‘cause you interfered and wasted time on me.
Joanna.
All you had to do was abandon me, but no, you couldn’t get that right.
Joanna, Joanna.
You didn’t think I could handle myself?  I beg to disagree.

Jack: I’m sorry, Boone, but just go away.  Joanna’s dead.
Never saw her before today.
Helping doesn’t pay.  Helping doesn’t pay.  Joanna’s dead.
Helping doesn’t pay.  Helping doesn’t pay.  Joanna’s dead.

Kate: Jack, you look exhausted.  Go and get some rest.  Nobody doubts you tried.
Jack: Joanna, Joanna.
I gotta go; what I think I see must mean I’m going mad.
Joanna.
Overcome with guilt, and I shudder at the judgment in my father’s eyes.
Joanna, Joanna.
I never thought, even with him dead, I’d have to dodge my dad.

I’m sorry, Kate.  Need to get away.  Joanna’s dead.
Never saw her before today.
Now, my dad would say, “Let it go, okay?  Joanna’s dead.”
But I can’t obey.  Need to get away.  Joanna’s dead.

Okay, I have a few things to say.  Joanna’s dead,
But Boone tried saving her today.
Put your barbs away.  Fighting’s not okay.  That angst will spread.
There’s a better way.  If we’re here to stay, let’s bond instead.

If we’re here to stay, if we’re here to stay, let’s bond instead.
If we’re here to stay, if we’re here to stay, let’s bond instead.

Outside of Time (The Shadow of O'Casey, Tommy Sands)

"Your father and mother and all of you are - as you used to call it in the Shadowlands - dead. The term is over: the holidays have begun. The dream is ended: this is the morning."
- Aslan, The Last Battle

Christian: Everyone dies sometime, kiddo. Some of them before you, some... long after you.
Jack: But why are they all here now?
Christian: Well, there is no "now" here.
- The End

Here's Christian talking to Jack in the church at the end of The End, to the tune of the Irish Rovers' The Shadow of O'Casey. (It looks like iTunes is the only place online to hear this song, so you have to pay a dollar if you want to listen to this one. Or buy the album; it's fantastic!)

Outside of Time

Bid farewell to your sorrow. If you have the faith to follow,
A brighter tomorrow is what you will find.
At the end of one story’s the pathway to glory.
We’ll evermore be outside of time.

Please accept that you’ve reached the morning, and the nightmares won’t return.
You have walked in painful darkness, but the light will always burn.
You should know there is no “now” here. Those people all have died.
But life in here is bigger that it was on the outside.

Bid farewell to your sorrow. If you have the faith to follow,
A brighter tomorrow is what you will find.
At the end of one story’s the pathway to glory.
We’ll evermore be outside of time.

Jack, I know this is surprising. We’re scientific men.
But we’re also wiser than we used to be back then,
And the answers to your questions all lie beyond the door.
Let’s go in together. What are we waiting for?

Bid farewell to your sorrow. If you have the faith to follow,
A brighter tomorrow is what you will find.
At the end of one story’s the pathway to glory.
We’ll evermore be outside of time.

There were days you were lost and lonely, but kiddo, those are done.
The knife that monster wielded, it cut right through you, son.
But with Vincent there for comfort, you departed with a smile
And arrived to a glorious new sunrise. It was all worthwhile.

Bid farewell to your sorrow. If you have the faith to follow,
A brighter tomorrow is what you will find.
At the end of one story’s the pathway to glory.
We’ll evermore be outside of time.

Bid farewell to your sorrow. If you have the faith to follow,
A brighter tomorrow is what you will find.
At the end of one story’s the pathway to glory.
We’ll evermore be outside of time.
Outside of time.

The Shadow of O'Casey

Jack's Pledge (The Edge, Michael Card)

"I'll do it... This is why I’m here. This is... this is what I'm supposed to do."
- Jack, What They Died For

Jack has been Our Hero from the very beginning of LOST, but he's had to work through some massive issues before he was ready to embrace the role of Island guardian. Here, he reflects on what he's learned as fatherly Jacob makes him his replacement, to the tune of Michael Card's The Edge.

Jack’s Pledge

You were calmly watching me on that momentous day
When I arrived and dove into the fray.
Yes, you tracked me down and followed me and drove me to the edge,
And now I am content to make this pledge.

I promise I will cast away the dark and serve the light.
I swear, as your replacement, I will face this final fight.
I’ll drink your holy water, and I will count upon each friend
Who will aid me, for you made me the ticket to the end.

I’ve found more than I lost, and I am ready for this task.
I’m glad you think that I have what it takes.
You’ve given me a mission, and I’ll do just what you ask,
For you’ve healed me and forgiven my mistakes.

I promise I will cast away the dark and serve the light.
I swear, as your replacement, I will face this final fight.
I’ll drink your holy water, and I will count upon each friend
Who will aid me, for you made me the ticket to the end.

I realize the thirst for good in every human heart
Is better quenched together than apart.
I never was a Man of Faith; I stuck with facts instead.
But at last I see it’s best to blend the spirit and the head.

I promise I will cast away the dark and serve the light.
I swear, as your replacement, I will face this final fight.
I’ll drink your holy water, and I will count upon each friend
Who will aid me, for you made me the ticket to the end.

I will cast away the dark and serve the light.
I will face this final fight.

Try Treating Him Better (I Should Have Known Better, John Lennon)

"Would you do me a favor? If you and Sarah ever have a kid, try to treat him a little better than I treated you." - Christian, The Watch

Christian wasn't always a great dad to Jack, but at least he was aware of it and wanted to change things toward the end.  Here's Christian in the mobisode The Watch, to the tune of the Beatles' I Should Have Known Better.

Try Treating Him Better

Try treating him better than I treated you.
That’s what I hope you and Sarah will do
If you two have a kid, or a few.

You know, I never meant to be such a lousy dad,
But you have a right to be mad.
I feel bad.  I feel bad.
I’m sure that you can break the cycle, son.
Your kid will be the lucky one.  Oh,
Don‘t let your life wind up like mine.
Please don’t repeat what I have done.

Here, I hope this watch reminds you what I said and why.
Don’t let the days and minutes pass you by
Because time is in short, short supply.

You know, I never meant to be such a lousy dad.
But you have a right to be mad.
I feel bad.  I feel bad.
I’m sure that you can break the cycle, son.
Your kid will be the lucky one.  Oh,
Don‘t let your life wind up like mine.
Please don’t repeat what I have done.
Do better, son.
Do better, son.
Do better, son.

Hippocratic Lament (American Tune, Paul Simon / Johann Sebastian Bach / Hans Hassler)

Jack's relationship with Christian has been one of the most complex on the show. Here, to the tune of Paul Simon's American Tune, I imagine him struggling to come to grips with his father's death, juggling bitterness, respect and affection, and discounting the validity of his Island experience in White Rabbit. (The actual song kicks in at about two-minute mark on the video.)

Hippocratic Lament

Many’s the time my father told me,
“You don’t have what it takes.”
And when I wanted him to hold me,
He wouldn't soothe my aches.
Oh, but I’ve grown up. I’ve grown up,
And I thought that I’d moved on.
Still, I’ve felt the hollowness gnawing at my heart
Since I’ve known he was gone, since I’ve known he was gone.

And he said that I had to keep my distance.
He said I could not afford to care.
He said that I needed his assistance
For dural sac repair.
But I’ve grown up. I’ve grown up,
And I hope I proved him wrong.
Still, I accept that his pushing made me strong
And wish we’d got along.
Oh, why couldn’t we learn to get along?

And I dreamed that I saw him.
I dreamed that the man who I so longed to see
Was standing in front of me,
Beckoning silently.
And I dreamed of his coffin,
Which, to my surprise, was empty as could be.
Exhaustion was tricking me.
That’s not reality.
But I dreamed that I saw him.

Now he never will know how much he taught me.
He never will know how much he meant.
He never will realize that he brought me
To this Hippocratic lament.
Oh, I have grown up. Yeah, I’ve grown up, I’ve grown up.
I’m a doctor, not a child.
Still, I will remember, in the midst of many frowns,
Those rare instances when he smiled.
I will remember the times he smiled.

Meant to Suffer (Talkin' to the Wrong Man, Michael Martin Murphey)

"Some people are just supposed to suffer. That's why the Red Sox will never win the series."
- Christian, Outlaws

Jack and Christian's complicated relationship is right at the heart of LOST. The sixth season may offer a more direct opportunity for reconciliation, but I love that Sawyer gets to help in healing the rift back in the first season. Here's a reflection to the tune of Michael Martin Murphey's Talkin' to the Wrong Man.

Meant to Suffer

Christian: Hey, cowboy. If you’re down under
And drowning all your sorrows in this bar,
Then you must have major problems.
Brooding isn’t gonna get you far.
I let my son think that I hate him.
With a phone call, I could be free.
I’m a weakling. Hesitation
Will make you just as miserable as me.

Maybe I was meant to suffer,
Meant to wallow in my cowardice and sin.
Some folks were meant to suffer.
That’s why the Sox are never gonna win.

Jack: Listen, Sawyer, I should say thank you.
But now that you are handing me that gun,
I’m wondering how she could convince you.
Do I dare to ask you what she has done?
I have a feeling if you were to tell me,
I’d wish that I had never heard your news.
Guess my dad was onto something
When he said the Sox are always gonna lose.

Maybe I was meant to suffer,
Meant to seethe while you make secret deals with Kate.
Some folks were meant to suffer.
My father always chalked it up to fate.

Sawyer: Met a doctor down in Sydney.
Well, his son and him, they’d gotten in a fight,
And he wished he had the guts to tell him,
“I’m proud of you. I love you. You were right.”

He said he was meant to suffer,
But he knew he was to blame for his own fall.
Some folks were meant to suffer;
It looks like Christian never made that call.
Looks like Christian never made that call.

Talkin' to the Wrong Man

The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham (Greenland Whale Fisheries, Traditional)

John Locke has always been one of my favorite characters on LOST. Boy, did he get the short end of the stick. Here's a bit of a rarity for me, a parody not written from the perspective of a particular character, though it is addressed to John, to the tune of Peter Paul and Mary's Greenland Whale Fisheries.

The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham

When you flash through time and you lose your grip
And you land with a fracture of the leg
And then Christian comes and he says to turn the wheel,
No more, no more Island for you, John Locke.
No more, no more Island for you.

‘Twas in some unspecified Island time
When Frank had flown away,
Taking Jack and Kate and Hurley and the rest,
That you learned you couldn’t stay, John Locke.
You learned you couldn’t stay.

You turned the wheel and you found yourself
In Tunisia in the sand.
You were hurt, you were hurt, you were hurt but then you got
A surprising helping hand, John Locke.
Yes, Widmore’s helping hand.

So he sent you out with a pseudonym
And a list of friends you had to find.
But Sayid was sharp and Kate, she was cruel,
And poor Hurley’d lost his mind, John Locke.
Poor Hurley’d lost his mind.

Well, you called on Walt, who had grown so tall,
And he was kind to you,
But he’d lost so much, you could ask no more of him.
You bid the boy adieu, John Locke.
You bid the boy adieu.

Oh, Jack was obstinate and mean.
“John, it’s over! Go away,” he said.
But then Ben was there, and he really seemed to care
Until he choked you dead, John Locke.
Until he choked you dead.

When you flash through time and you lose your grip
And you land with a fracture of the leg
And then Christian comes and he says to turn the wheel,
No more, no more Island for you, John Locke.
No more, no more Island for you.

Greenland Whale Fisheries

The Summons (The Island, Paul Brady)

LOST made us wait a very long time to meet Jacob, the mysterious entity whose existence has been hinted at since season two. He finally turned up in the season five finale, in a manner that managed to only increase his mystique, even though he appeared in a very down-to-earth manner. There's still so much left to learn about Jacob that I was hesitant to try to write anything from his perspective, but I decided to just work with what I think I know so far. This is the way I see Jacob now; hopefully that won't be completely turned on its head by the end of the season. The tune is Paul Brady's The Island, as sung by Celtic Thunder's Keith Harkin. With a title like that, I knew I'd have to get around to it sometime...

The Summons

Katie, you’re on the run for theft and murder.
You have a Marshal closing in on you.
It seems you just can’t stay away from trouble
Although I very nicely asked you to.
And James, your life’s defined by vengeance
And you’ve become the thing you hated most.
I know there’s so much more to both of you, though.

So get a ticket, you two.
I’ve found a flight that you can come on.
It’s Oceanic 815.
And once you get here, you will be at your best.
It’s a tiring test,
But worth it.

I’m gonna bring you to the Island.
I’ve brought many here before.
But something tells me, when it’s all said and done,
You’re the ones who will prove me the victor.

Now, Jack and John, you both have father issues.
One is demanding; one is simply cruel.
And they have shaped you into stubborn people,
Each one determined not to look a fool.
Jack, you are so adept at helping,
You don’t know how to ask for help yourself.
And John, you will not accept your limitations.

Just get a ticket, you two.
‘Cause I’ve found a flight that you can come on.
It’s Oceanic 815.
And once you get here, you will be at your best.
It’s a tiring test,
But worth it.

I’m gonna bring you to the Island.
I’ve brought many here before.
But something tells me, when it’s all said and done,
You’re the ones who will prove me the victor.

Hugo, I’m aware that you’ve been feeling worthless,
And you think your luck and sanity ran out.
And I know it’s hard to have a sense of purpose
While drowning in a flood of guilt and doubt.
You need to understand the truth now, Hugo.
Your kindness blesses everyone you meet.
And soon you’ll come to see that you are special.
Special.
Special...

That's the Island (That's a Woman, Phil Coulter)

In so many ways, LOST is about Jack, the first character we met in the series premiere. From the beginning, he assumed a leadership role and showed great skill in rallying most of the castaways and convincing them to work together for survival. He thrived in that environment, but he never enjoyed it and was always focused on leaving. Post-Island, he seems to have a change of heart.

My last reflection was a gently regretful soliloquy to the tune of Mountains of Mourne, as sung by Keith Harkin of Celtic Thunder. Both songs deal with a man confessing to the woman he loves that the place he was so determined to get to doesn't feel as fulfilling as the place he left. I started writing it before the season started, and then The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham helped me finish it.

It also helped me realize I wanted a whole song dealing exclusively with the extended Jack-John showdown, and That's a Woman, the Celtic Thunder duet between Ryan Kelly and Paul Byrom, seemed an ideal vehicle. John, like Paul, is hopelessly smitten, but in this case the object of his affections is the Island rather than a woman. He's a total sap when it comes to the Island, while Jack is vitriolic, laying on the Sawyerish snark as he details the reasons he detests the Island. This duet takes their debate from their first days on the Island up until their second arrival.

That's the Island

Season One

John: Island, such a heavenly haven.
Don't be craven.
Now we can make a new start.
Explore it.
Learn to adore it
Before it
Gives you the chance to depart.

Jack: A torturous trap where we happened to crash.
Better take it from me, that's the Island.
I'm mired in a mess like a medic on M*A*S*H.
We were not meant to be on the Island.
My boozy dad's body was bound for L.A.,
Not meant to be on the Island.
He ought to be deep in dirt by today,
Not staring and scaring my senses away
On the Island, on the Island.

Season Two

Jack: A den of abductions and dread and deceit.
Take it from me, that's the Island.
Full of murderous men we don't want to meet.
Take it from me, that's the Island.
Who's to say hatches are better than huts
On this mysterious Island?
Pushing the button's the work of a putz.
You sob, "It's our job!" but I think you've gone nuts
On the Island, on the Island.

John: Perfect and pure, that's the Island.
Miracle cure, that's the Island.
Driving us all to be daring,
Strange as the secrets it's sharing.
When you look in the eye of the Island

Jack: Look in its eye and you'll probably die!
That's the Island!

John: And ponder the "why" of the Island

Jack: John, it doesn't mean squat! There's no purpose or plot
On the Island!

John: You're purging your past
And you're special at last.

Both: The enigmas are vast
On the Island!

Season Three

John: Island, in need of protection.
My defection
Gave me the knowledge I need.
Don't cater
To the folks from the freighter.
They're traitors
Waiting to watch our world bleed.

Jack: Bait all the natives and blow 'em to bits,
That's how we exit the Island.
Hike up the hill 'cause the phone's on the fritz,
That's how we exit the Island.
Take a trek to the tower to turn off Rousseau,
That's how we exit the Island.
With Charlie in charge down below,
He'll let us know when all systems are go
On the Island, on the Island.

Season Four

Jack: It took a little more time than I planned.
Now we can exit the Island.
Do I have to put up with your silly last stand?
I'm ready to exit the Island.
You stay in your leafy botanical lodge,
Lavishing love on the Island.
Go in there and pick out a handsome corsage;
We'll hop on the chopper and get outta Dodge.
So long, Island, so long, Island!

Season Five

Jack: Look at my aimless and miserable state.
I think I'm missing the Island.
I'm dour and drunk and rejected by Kate.
I think I'm missing the Island.
Gotta find another plane
To get me back to the Island.
I'm trusting Ben. Am I insane?
I hear your voice inside my brain:
"What an Island!" What an Island...

Memory of John: Perfect and pure, that's the Island.

Jack: I'm perfectly keen to take Flight Three-Sixteen
To the Island.

Memory of John: Miracle cure, that's the Island.

Jack: You cured my doubts; too bad you're on the outs
With the Island.

Memory of John: Driving us all to be daring...

Jack: Thanks to your dare, I'm in the air.
To the Island!

Memory of John: Strange as the secrets it's sharing.

Both: When you look in the eye of the Island
And ponder the "why" of the Island,
You're purging your past
And you're special at last.

Jack: Now the die has been cast.

Both: To the Island!

Jack: Sure as I'm Jack, it's great to be back!

Both: What an island!